Harry Potter and the Last EVER MarySue EVER!
by GaNgStAcHiK
Summary: What ever happened to the LAST EVER Mary-Sue?........Read our story to find out...Bye Joanne & Helen!


Harry Potter and the very last ever "Mary-Sue"

Disclaimer: ...And Harry Potter and all his little wizarding friends went straight to hell for practising witchcraft!! So No, I do not own Harry Potter or I would not have to resort to writing fanfics about him on this website. I also (unfortunately) do not own lil' Romeo ï neither do I own Britney Spears (thank God) however I DO own the nickname Shona the Loner! Hope you like it please R&R!!

One day Hermione 'bushelhead' granger was walking towards the dungeons to her potions lesson like a good lil boffin when she came across Marissa-Susanna, an American exchange student with lively but dead straight waist length blonde hair, gigantic blue eyes and Jordan-sized boobs. She seemed not to realize that they actually have lessons at Hogwarts (U know the wanna be British, American hp fic writers style) and arse-hugging blue Dior jeans with a hot-pink halter neck top She clopped over to Hermione in her nine inch heels and asked her if she could tell her where the dungeons were. "That's were I'm going, I can take you there if you like?" Hermione offered although it was clear from her acne covered face that she didn't like the blonde one bit.

As Marissa-Susanna and Bushelhead walked towards the dungeons Marissa noticed a boy with beach blonde hair that was glued to his head with super glue, she licked her botoxed lips seductively and attempted to walk over to him in her heels... her hips where waggling shaking her perfectly shaped bum from side to side when she suddenly let out a little yelp (that sounded much like Natalie bush when someone speaks English in French lesson) she "fell" to the floor without a thud and clutched her ankle protectively. Draco Malfoy rushed forward quickly to aid the 'girl' that was sprawled on the floor, she held onto Draco as if she would die if she let go and battered her eyelashes flirtatiously. "Hi" she said to Draco smiling at him, he smiled back and was about to introduce himself when that greasy knot ball otherwise known as Snape came out of the classroom

MALFOY! Stop molesting our new student at

Once!! But that instant Michael Jackson came galloping through the corridor on a 3 humped came! With lil Romeo riding on the back "Yo what up dawg?" he said to the slut who might as well been called Britney Spears as they were exactly alike, she once again tried making her way towards him in her disgustingly pink heels and was about to kiss lil Romeo when... OH NO!! Is it a bomb?!? Is it a giant football!?!?! Is it a hot air balloon?!?!?! NO ITS SHONER THE LONER!!! ARGGGG!!! Everyone knew what this meant and Bushelhead darted towards the air-raid alarm! Immediately came the loud siren noise chanting she's a fat girl help us save us she's gonna eat us fat girl save us! and 1200 tiny(compared to Shona the loner) people darted out of the school building determined not to be eaten (again) But it was no use, even though the tiny people ran as fast as their lil legs could carry them Shona was REALLY hungry! She hadn't eaten in a whole 10 minutes! She grabbed Wako Jako and Marissa and shoved them in her super sized mouth OH NO!!! cried Draco, who, although described as a man sket Mary-sue in the quizzes, was actually an ugly skinny lactose-tolerant bugger, had never had any interest from girls (except for one CRAZY fan named Joanne Moran) and his only chance, the perfectly, sickly perfect woman with fakey whore written across her head was no-more :(

Shona suddenly saw Draco crying like a baby on the ground as she picked him up and instantly fell in love with him, she also noticed Ron and Harry cowering behind a statue nearby so she picked them up too, she tried to kiss Ron but accidentally bit his head off instead. There was a certain likeness between the two, poor, fat, ginger and addicted to cocaine. But she got over him quickly, it was all about the sexy, pot head, Harry (who was smoking a joint of weed) Shona couldn't help it...It was all too much...and CHOMP!! The whole of Hogwarts was instantly gone inside her big, fat, HUMUNGUS belly!!...thus ridding the qwizarding world of ghetto versions of the students, Mary-sues and all distant relatives and the pot-smokers of the 21st Century.


End file.
